The DECIDE Process

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The DECIDE Process

Define: My friend is asking me togo to a party but I know I'd besneaking out behind my parentsbacks. This is affecting my socialwellness.

Explore: I could agree and sneak outbehind my parents' backs but thatwould be wrong. Instead, I could sayno thank you or say maybe anothertime so that our social relationshipisn't messed up. I could also ask myparents if I could go to the party andsee if they say yes, but if they say noand I over react, they might bekeeping a closer watch on me.

Consider consequences: If I dosneak out without my parentsknowing and agreeing, I could bepunished, (which would ruin mysocial relationship with them) or Icould be punished in other ways,like being told I can never hangout with that friend ever againbecause she influenced me to go.

Identify values: One of the valuesI would be loosing is trust withmy parents if I were to go to theparty. If I weren't, I could keepmy trust with my parents butmaybe not with my friend. In thefuture, I plan on going to a goodcollege, if I do somethingirresponsible, it could go on mypermanent record and could ruina lot in my life. (It would bebetter not to go.)

Decide and Act: I will be choosing to ask myparents if I can go to the party. If they say yesthen I won't have to worry about getting introuble with them and ruining our socialrelationship. If they say no then I wouldrespect their decision, whine a little, but stillstay out of trouble and away from the party. Imight not have an as strong relationship withthe friend but if she won't understand that Ican't go and that's it, we might not be thatgood of friends anyway.

Explore the Results: I would be alittle disappointed that I couldn't gobut my social relationships withother people wouldn't be ruined oranything. There would be less riskby staying home anyways andmaybe that would stop my friendfrom sneaking out too.